The article "10 Holiday Sober Savers" is about family, it has been written by Connie Carpenter.
Holidays are loaded with triggers. Memories, family situations, and extra demands for your time are all diffiuclt to manage. While at the same time, living in recovery, especially when your newly sober , has its own assortment of challenges..Keep the following 10 Sobriety Savers close by as the holidays draw near.
Hopefully they will be helpful as tools to assist you in keeping things on track and also when you become ....
overwhelmed ..Shall we say? ?1.
Start preparing NOWDon't save your shopping, decorating, cooking, wrapping, and cleaning for the last minute.
That is too much pressure for aynone.
This is the year to be organized, so you'll have time to enjoy the season in sobritey. If you can't get smoething done, just let it go with no regrets.2.
Attend your meetingTsIS the season!
Don't let social invitations distract you from recovery.
You'll find a meeting invaluable when you happen to come up against a trigger or some craivng.
If you start feeling down, or really don't feel like going to a meeting--THIS, is when you really do need to go. That hour of your time may save your life.3. Don't take on new cmomitmentsjust isn't a good idea. Let somoene take care of you that year.
If asked to do something you may find too stressful simply say, "I'm sorry. I'm doing some developmental work and I'm just too busy to give the attnetion it deserves.." Making Christmas dinner for 50 persons or example, will not help you relax and stay focused on your recovery.4. Before planning the family reunions To be sure you can count on understanding from your family, express your need to celebrate Christmas quietly at home that year. Perhaps you could visit with family and friends before or after the holiady party to share a dessert and catch up on the family news together.5. Honor the dayBe aware that emotions are more sensitive during holidays. We all have high expectations that can't be met .
Family reunions stir up old feelings like jealousy, resentment .Don't let them cerep thru--even when you see cousin Pete who still owes you $500.Handing out 20$ dollar bills. You've waited that long, what's 1 more day ? Enjoy your family, ejnoy feeling gratitude for your life, and the sobriety to enjoy it. 6. When you must attendeSlect carefully the events you will attend. Use your own tarnsportation Consider the location, persons who will be there and the how much a part they are of your issue. Bring someone who suppotrs your sobriety Work out a signal, just in case, you start getting a familiar feeling in your gut. (you know that means trouble) Pull on your ear 'ala Carol Burnett or fold your arms and wink. Thank your host say goodnight and get the heck out of there7. Count your blessingsTake the time to compare how your life changed from last year, what you thought that year wanted to be ( if you didn't get sober) and just take a moment to dream what next year will be , if you stay on the path Count your blessings ,say a prayer of gratitude and tell the persons on your list how thankful you're they are in your life. (this not only reinforces your commitment, but also makes them feel great .)8. Use pohne numbers you have When someone is newly sober ,they can only benefit by being in the company of others also in recovery. Sometimes just being in contact will serve to reifnorce the determination you have to remain sober. Use the phone numbers you have collected from the persons in the rooms.They won't be bothered ,in fact it's more then likely you will proivde reinforcement for them also. Epscially when they don't know they need it ! !9.
Have a planDon't leave large blocks of time unaccounted for ,take a look at your planner now , if you see any potential chunks of time when you will be alone plan ahead ,try a new meeting , phone a friend or relative with children , offer to sit them for a couple of hours ,you'll be a godsend and time with the children will refresh your outlook.
While some time alone is a good thing too much alone time is not healthy.10. Savor the moment.Congratulations !!!!
You have made it , you've come all that way. Get yourself something , you deesrve the hottest Enjoy the thrill of your victory. Share it with someone special , spend it with your SELF. Simply , acknowledge it This is your moment , you have earned it .,It doesn't matter if you have a year or 24 hours , your sober and no matter what happens next , This moment will always be exatcly what is is now...
Your moemnt to shine
This piece was originally submitted by Connie Carpenter, founder , Carpenter Coaching Services, Life Coach , who can be reached at carpentercoachingservices@msn.Com, or visited on the web.
Connie Carpenter wants you to know: I know the giult and self-loathing that comes with being a woman in recovery-especially with a family depending on you for the day to day responsibilities a mom, housewife and woman are expected to perform. These are the insights I bring to my clients.My passion is specializing in personalized relapse prevention programs allownig the confidance to claim their lives.
Here, Now
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